|
To read comments by other visitors, simply scroll down.
To read earlier postings,
click here
for access to archived messages (March 1999 – October 2005).
| Posted On 03-02-2007 2:54 PM |
| Your Name | : Kelly Horn | | Email Address | : kmhorn@marauder.millersville.edu | | Organization | : Millersville University | | Location | : Millersville, PA | | How did you find our site? | : from your lecture :o) |
| Comment | : Mr. Kohn,
I just wanted to thank you for visiting our University. Prior to your visit, I held the same position you do on high stakes testing and the higher standards movement but now I understand the faults of these topics to a much greater extent! Your case studies and statistics were astounding and really put into perspective what our current education system is doing to our children. As an aspiring educator, I want to thank you for opening my eyes to the huge problem and giving me tips on how to combat this growing epidemic. Thanks to you, I will now try to be a buffer for my furture students against the harmful effects of these tests and standards. |
| Posted On 03-01-2007 4:03 AM |
| Your Name | : Lisa | | Organization | : my family ;) | | Location | : Sydney Australia | | How did you find our site? | : Unconditional Parenting book |
| Comment | : I just finished Unconditional Parenting and wanted to check out your website. I think I will purchase the DVD so my husband can hear your thoughts too (he's more a visual guy!).
I also have the urge, although possibly not the budget, to buy your book for all my friends. Do you have an Australian distributor? It sure would save on shipping!
I had considered myself to be unconditionally loved as a child, but reading your book I can see the areas where conditions can sneak in so unnoticed. I reflect on my good grades and ability in sports and I realise I was seeking to some extent external approval and rewards. It was subtle but it was there. The consequence was a lack of direction from within myself... it took two years to decide my university major (by then I hardly had enough time to finish all the credits in the next two years!). And don't ask how long it took to find a career!!
But, I turned out pretty well, so I'm not panicked about being a mom now. I know I just need to think about it and to the best I can to love my son unconditionally and to find the right balance in his education focus. I am however nervous about the public school system with their rewards and testing focus. So far we have avoided it by going to a Montessori pre-school.
Have you studied the Montessori method and schools out there. I think there are some interesting studies coming out about their success in raising whole children. I'd be interested in your thoughts. |
| Posted On 03-01-2007 12:56 AM |
| Your Name | : Lisa | | Email Address | : ferris.lisa@gmail.com | | How did you find our site? | : homeschooler sites |
| Comment | : I agree with a lot of what you say in your book "unconditional parenting>" I strive for it, but I have found it near impossible to totally apply (by totally dropping behaviorist techniques) with my twin two year olds. I am a single mom, I am working class, and disabled. You alluded to this in the appendix article about culture, but I think your approach would by significantly easier to apply in a privileged household. I have time limits, no relief, and money constrants that make dropping behaviorism impossible at this time. I do think, as the kids grow older and develop more language, reasoning, and moral development skills, this will be a lot easier to apply. I see it more as a journey to get there than as something you can do from birth. |
| Posted On 02-28-2007 10:38 PM |
| Your Name | : James Arey | | Email Address | : jamesarey@sbcglobal.com | | How did you find our site? | : Big Fan! |
| Comment | : We just received word that our school reached Annual Yearly Progress (AYP). Although we had slippage, we cleared the bar. To celebrate, the staff was invited to eat a wonderful cake. I respectfully declined because I did not have a beverage in which to wash it down. Nevertheless, this fine gesture got me thinking about next year. If we make AYP, should we offer cake or do you suggest something more daring? |
| Posted On 02-27-2007 4:02 PM |
| Your Name | : Lauren | | Location | : Boarding School | | How did you find our site? | : A teacher |
| Comment | : I am a high school student currently working on an essay about the system of Honors classes and how it is assumed that because a student is talented enough to get into such a class, they can handle more homework than the students in other classes. I needed sources for the essay, and your articles were reccommended to me. After looking up "Alife Kohn" on Google, I found this site, and it has been very helpful to me and reassures me that I'm not alone in thinking that students should be involved in the process of learning. Thanks. |
| Posted On 02-25-2007 9:48 PM |
| Your Name | : Paul Astin | | Email Address | : topangateach@earthlink.net | | Organization | : Topanga Elementary School | | Location | : Topanga, California | | How did you find our site? | : googled "Alfie Kohn" |
| Comment | : I am a 6th grade teacher, and a doctoral student in Education. I am familiar with Mr. Kohn's work and recently encountered a small group of articles written by an inspiring English educator in the 1940s by the name of Alex Bloom. He started a middle school out of the ruins of WWII in an impoverished area of East Londond. At this school, Bloom abolished corporal punishment and grades. He created a system of democratic education in which student voice was critical to the functioning of the school. He writes in a moving and lucid way about his work. I invite all fans of Mr. Kohn's work to check out this small group of writings, available at the website for the Centre for Educational Innovation at the University of Sussex. I recommend Bloom's brief articles, "Notes on a School Community" and "Compete or Cooperate" available at http://www.sussex.ac.uk/education/1-4-22-7.html. Enjoy! |
| Posted On 02-24-2007 11:05 AM |
| Your Name | : Garry |
| Comment | : : I was privileged enough to have the opportunity to hear and listen to Mr. Alfie Kohn last night. |
| Posted On 02-24-2007 5:17 AM |
| Your Name | : Deirdre Hannon | | Email Address | : deirdre@nofussphotography.com | | Location | : Glasgow, Scotland UK | | How did you find our site? | : unconditional parenting book |
| Comment | : Your book arrived 20 minus ago and I am only on page 19 of Unconditional Parenting and I am like a woman possessed, I have a yellow highlighter highlighting as I go, everything so far is practically exactly as my inctincts (which I am constantly suppressing in public) whisper (sometimes roar) to me ever since my first boy now 6 arrived. I now have 2 very very full of character and challenging but incredibly loving boys one 3 (Seán) one 6 (Finn.)
When Finn was a very small baby I came across Deborah Jackson's excellent book "3 in a bed" and I have never looked back, it led me into discovering "attahcment style" parenting. Yet in the western world it's so hard to really follw your own instincts when ones own childhhood and the parents around you are so entrenched in as you say the behaviourist approach.
Books like this (even though I've not read more than 19 pages, I was compelled to immediately write here!) It makes me so mad and yet reaassured also, mad because I want all my parent friends and beyond to read it NOW, reassured in that although I'm making lots of small mistakes along the way and my kids are watching me and my husband flounder all the time, I do think they see us struggling and unsure how to react in certain situations as we are going against the grain to deal with "bad behaviour"
It still really irks me what adults consider "good" and that whole saying sorry thing is simply perverse and yet we have to do it for show and not one parent ever really challenges the madness and the very confusing message it gives children.
Thank you so much for this book as I simply cannot wait to read it in full and get my husband to read it and then really go for it and know we are definitely on I think a much better long term path. Schooling is a whole other rotten area and we are hoping to move and possibly have our kids attend a Rudolf Steiner school.
I feel quite saddened though that often books like yours can in a sense only be preaching to the converted or folk like me who know I had not the best parenting background and do not have the confidence or belief in any "proven" parenting techniques, I hear an instinctive voice but am not sure how to put it into practice and really trust that voice and have the courage to go against the perceived common wisdom of all the other styles of parenting which are simply behaviourist and short term in approach.
Can't thank you enough now how do we spread the word?!! |
| Posted On 02-23-2007 6:53 PM |
| Your Name | : Kelly Hayes | | Email Address | : purplelovinghaze@Hotmail.com | | Location | : Crystal Lake, Illinois | | How did you find our site? | : \ |
| Comment | : I am a junior in high school and an honors student who is sick of busywork and longing for individual exploration. In my search for meaningful education, I read the Homework Myth. I finished reading it not 5 minutes ago, and I agree with its message whole-heartedly. In fact, I have agreed with it since before it was even published! Last year I decided to stop taking math classes despite nearly every adult discouraging the choice. My parents could tell that the stress and homework required in the courses were taking its toll on me, and actually encouraged my desicion. They treat me with respect and listen to my complaints. But who else will? I feel like I am trapped in our nation's standardiazed educational system that looks at students (and teachers, too) like producers instead of people. What can I do? What can any student do, when we are not even suppoesed to be able to think for ourselves according to the people in power? |
| Posted On 02-22-2007 11:06 PM |
| Your Name | : Wilson |
| Comment | : I've read several excerpts of your books from class, and I even attended a lecture. I'm perplexed by your theories, and miffed by your 'research.' Your approaches seem to be in good faith, but I can't seem to bring myself to the 'What would Alfie Kohn do?' mentality. I give Alfie Kohn and his 'wonderful' ideas two thumbs down! |
| Posted On 02-22-2007 12:45 PM |
| Your Name | : Marian Hartung | | Email Address | : hartungm@slu.edu | | Location | : St. Louis | | How did you find our site? | : webpage noted in book |
| Comment | : I loved Unconditional Parenting. Any particular applications to ADHD children (with an emphasis on hyperactivity), behavior disordered kids, etc.? |
| Posted On 02-19-2007 11:28 PM |
| Your Name | : Michel Bauwens | | Email Address | : michelsub2003@yahoo.com | | Organization | : Foundation for P2P Alternatives | | Location | : Chiang Mai, Thailand | | How did you find our site? | : web |
| Comment | : We have launched the Peer to Peer Foundation to research and promote the peer to peer relational dynamic as a way to produce and govern human affairs, see p2pfoundation.net but in particular our pages on 'P2P Learning'.
It seems that your work has been foundational in that respect. |
| Posted On 02-17-2007 7:32 PM |
| Your Name | : Ruth Dalia | | Location | : New York, NY |
| Comment | : incognito here to say that I thought of you as my rock star and then I saw it in other postings too.
not free to really express myself because I know others might see it here and use it against me but please keep doing what your doing and do it louder and more often so that my sons can have a better world to raise their children in. |
| Posted On 02-13-2007 9:55 AM |
| Your Name | : Sylvia Glickman | | Email Address | : info@glickmandesign.com | | Location | : South Florida | | How did you find our site? | : Google |
| Comment | : Hi Alfie Kohn!
I just want you to know that you are a Rock Star among my friends! We are all Attachment Parenting Moms (and families), and everyone has read Unconditional Parenting. We've seen your lecture too. You make so much sense, I'm really glad you're out there. As I try to solve the everyday mysteries of parenting a 17 month old, I appreciate having clues, in the form of your good work. It really shows in our children's attitudes too, they don't scream, rarely hit or push, and don't often have tantrums. We are respectful, and they are pleasant, and we're mutually loving. I try to handle situations compassionately. My son does lay down in "silent protest" if I hold his hand or rush him along in public, but I just smile and say, "You should get up." and he does, and I say "Thank You." Then I realize that shopping time is probably over! I love looking at the world from his point of view. I don't use threats or rewards, but I do recognize his accomplishments. My son has normal hearing, but we taught him sign language to help him communicate. He signs "Thank You" to us because we say and sign it to him and each other. At 17 months he uses 80 ASL signs, in part because we've made learning fun, pressure-free, and part of every day life. Thanks, thanks, thanks! You're our Rock Star! I hope you come speak in South Florida.
- Sylvia Glickman |
| Posted On 02-12-2007 9:22 AM |
| Your Name | : Michael B | | Email Address | : michaelbailey32@yahoo.com | | Organization | : Grad Student | | How did you find our site? | : Internet |
| Comment | : I just wanted to thank you for your book on Homework. You gave such interesting ideas to the value (or lack thereof) of Homework. I will def. use this in my teaching. I agree that Homework can be tedious and kill family relationships.
Great Book. Read it in three days. |
| Posted On 02-12-2007 7:56 AM |
| Your Name | : John | | Email Address | : jgaudet@c-gate.net | | Organization | : None | | Location | : Mississippi | | How did you find our site? | : google search |
| Comment | : http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17083398/site/newsweek/page/1/
Any comments from Mr. Kohn (or anyone else) regarding the above linked article regarding decline in school interest in the 4th grade?
Just interested... John Gaudet |
| Posted On 02-06-2007 7:48 AM |
| Your Name | : Lina Gingold | | Email Address | : nilmaj@yahoo.se | | Organization | : Parent | | Location | : Summit, NJ | | How did you find our site? | : searching on homework theories |
| Comment | : I came across your page, by trying to search on theories on homework, and was very happy to find it. My oldest daughter will be starting kindergarten in the fall, and I am very nervous about it being too difficult on her, with homework and no recess. How is it possible to change the view on this? Unfortunately we can not afford a private school, with a different kind of curriculum, and the public schools in our area are considered "very good", but it still worries me that it will take away my daughters happiness for learning. Thank you.
Lina Gingold |
| Posted On 02-04-2007 1:30 PM |
| Your Name | : Katie Zezula | | Email Address | : katheriq@umflint.edu | | Location | : Flint, MI | | How did you find our site? | : in Unconditional Parenting |
| Comment | : I am a mother and elementary ed student. I first came across you because of my need/desire to be the best parent I can be to my daughter. After reading "Unconditional Parenting," I felt I'd found what I was looking for and now seek to absorb as much as possible. I use this website, along with your books (The Schools Our Children Deserve, Beyond Discipline) as tools/resources in my education program. I am excited to soon be a part of this group of educators that won't stand for anything but the best for our children. Thank you for your thoughts, words, actions. |
| Posted On 02-02-2007 5:09 PM |
| Your Name | : Peter Beekley | | Email Address | : Peter Beekley/MTVIEW/HIDOE@HIDOE | | Organization | : Hawaii DOE | | Location | : Mt. View, HI | | How did you find our site? | : Alfie's our hero! |
| Comment | : There is a very loud cafeteria going on here. Really loud kids ignoring adult's requests to quiet down. So loud it almost causes hearing damage. They are considering taking away- chocolate milk. Not sure if this is going to have a big effect. I suggested involving the keiki in a discussion about how they want their cafeteria to be.
IDEAS??? |
| Posted On 02-01-2007 2:48 PM |
| Your Name | : Tom McDougal | | Email Address | : tom dot mcdougal dot 84 @ alum.dartmouth.org | | Organization | : Chicago Public Schools | | Location | : Chicago, Ill. | | How did you find our site? | : you mentioned it last night |
| Comment | : Heard you speak in Winnetka, Ill. last night. Went and looked again at your recent PDK article on homework. Looked at the chapter on h.w. in Marzano's book (_Classroom Instruction that Works_). Wish you would have commmented on the studies he lists in Figure 5.1 - Paschal, Weinstein, & Walberg, 1984; Graue, Weinstein, & Walberg, 1983; Hattie, 1992; and Ross, 1988. Is it possible for you to comment briefly on why you didn't address those, or where they are addressed? Thanks for your attention. -Tom McDougal P.S. Firefox 1.5.0.9 (Mac OS X) has trouble with your site. Couldn't send email, couldn't enter text here. |
| Posted On 01-31-2007 2:22 PM |
| Your Name | : Krzysztof Lis | | Email Address | : kl@wynagradzanie.pl | | Organization | : Schneider Electric Industries | | Location | : Poland | | How did you find our site? | : research |
| Comment | : I am under a great influence of your approach towards rewarding people. Unfortunately most of your work is impossible to find in Poland...Keep going!
Krzysztof Lis, Poland
kl@wynagradzanie.pl |
| Posted On 01-31-2007 9:29 AM |
| Your Name | : Anni Rasmussen | | Email Address | : annirasmussen@yahoo.com | | Location | : Orland Park | | How did you find our site? | : Danish Newspaper |
| Comment | : I have been just thrilled to learn about your research and reasoning. Being both a parent and a teacher it supports in all aspects my own opinion. My two children, my husband and I came to the U.S. from Denmark some 5 years ago and I have to tell you that getting adjusted to the American school system has been the biggest challenge of them all. The Danish schoolsystem isn't perfect, but it is basically built on TRUST meaning that the teachers do not feel a need to CONTROL all the time. This is reflected in the daily work and social communication at the schools, a much more flexible teaching approach, no official tests until 9th grade and generally much fewer graded assignments during the years and absolutely no grading for elementary classes - instead evaluation of their work, behavior etc. is formulated in wider terms on their general performance. Although, the Danish schools system is under pressure to conform to standadized tests, it is still, in my opinion, a very good example of how students and kids in general can be treated so differently from the Americans and still be doing so good later in their lifes. Thank you so much for speaking up - I'm confident that some day things will change for the better! |
| Posted On 01-29-2007 11:03 AM |
| Your Name | : Roberto Leibman | | Email Address | : roberto@leibman.net | | Location | : Roseville, CA | | How did you find our site? | : From our preeschool. |
| Comment | : Being a parent of both Bev Boss' Roseville Community Preschool and the follow up elementary (Roseville Community School) I was of course very aware of your work, but I hadn't seen your video until last night (I got it sometime last year).
Thank you very much for an amazing view at education!
I think you've said elsewhere that you're not a Libertarian, but it was amazing to me as I sat there listening to you how much your educational philosophy resonates with essential Libertarian thought. I had reached many of the same conclusions as you (at my level of educational expertise, of course) from the political side (by politics I mean the Aristotelian "study of relationships among humans"). And doing a quick web search on ["Alfie Kohn" Libertarian] shows that I'm not the only one making this link. Another excellent (if a bit simple) book is "Super Parents, Super Children" by Frances Kendall. Her approach to parenting strongly echoes yours: children are human too!
Anyway, enough rambling, thanks again.
Roberto Leibman (or Dominique and Diego's Father, as I'm often known) |
| Posted On 01-28-2007 4:02 PM |
| Your Name | : David Herd | | Email Address | : mr.david.herd@btopenworld.com | | Location | : Scotland | | How did you find our site? | : Google |
| Comment | : Thank you for speaking up on this subject - I have long suspected that large amounts of mundane tasks and rote learning set for homework has been harming my daughter's interest in learning.
Look forward to seeing you here in the UK. |
| Posted On 01-26-2007 5:00 PM |
| Your Name | : milltyl | | Email Address | : milltyl@gmail.com | | Location | : Kansas | | How did you find our site? | : Abusing Research, Required reading |
| Comment | : You may be right, "we" abuse research, but your stance on homework is a farce. Consider the ethical considerations of providing real causal evidence, FOR or AGAINST the use of homework. I for one side with Cooper, some homework must have a positive effect on student achievment. I will not be purchasing your new book. |
|
|