"Unconditional Parenting is going to make you think - hard - about the type of relationship you want to have with your child, about your parenting priorities, and about how to avoid many of the mistakes of our predecessors. It's what we've come to expect from Alfie Kohn, and this is unquestionably one of his most persuasive, important works. For your sake and your child's…read it!"
-- Ross W. Greene,
The Explosive Child
"This book underscores an important parenting principle: Discipline is more about having the right relationship with your child than having the right techniques."
-- William Sears,
The Baby Book and The Discipline Book
"I found myself wanting to underline every other sentence of Unconditional Parenting, which is different from - and a refreshing challenge to - most other books about raising children. It's entertaining enough so that you can read it quickly, but it's so packed with thought-provoking ideas that you'll want to take your time."
-- Barbara Coloroso,
Kids Are Worth It!
"A gift to parents! Armed with voluminous research, Alfie Kohn exposes the harm inherent in widely accepted disciplinary practices and offers a variety of powerful alternatives that make it possible for children to become their most thoughtful, caring, responsible selves."
-- Adele Faber,
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen...
"Alfie Kohn holds a crucial position in the American dialogue on parenting. Unconditional
Parenting is a very important book that can challenge, support, and even change our
perspective on what parents do."
The Wonder of Boys
"Alfie Kohn does it again: He takes a topic (parenting) that has been studied and written about for years and gives us a wise way of adjusting our lenses so that we really see it clearly. He doesn't give simple rules, he gives deep understanding and a core foundation for parents."
-- JoAnn Deak,
Girls Will be Girls
"A rich blend of insightful reflections and specific suggestions."
-- Rethinking Schools
"Author of nine books, including the controversial Punished by Rewards, Kohn expands
upon the theme of what's wrong with our society's emphasis on punishments and rewards. Kohn,
the father of young children, sprinkles his text with anecdotes that shore up his well-researched
hypothesis that children do best with unconditional love, respect, and the opportunity to make
their own choices. Kohn questions why parents and parenting literature focus on compliance and
quick fixes, and points out that docility and short-term obedience are not what most parents
desire of their children in the long run. He insists that 'controlling parents' are actually
conveying to their kids that they love them conditionally -- that is, only when they achieve
or behave. Tactics like time-out, bribes, and threats, Kohn claims, just worsen matters. Caustic,
witty, and thought-provoking, Kohn's arguments challenge much of today's parenting wisdom, yet
his assertion that 'the way kids learn to make good decisions is by making decisions, not by following
directions' rings true. Kohn suggests parents help kids solve problems; provide them with choices;
and use reason, humor, and, as a last resort, a restorative time away (not a punitive time-out).
This lively book will surely rile parents who want to be boss. Those seeking alternative methods of
raising confident, well-loved children, however, will warmly embrace Kohn's message. Kohn is a
controversial and popular author/speaker, well regarded by scholars and educators. This title
should appeal to parents who want to explore the 'whys' and not just the 'hows' of raising kids."
-- Publishers Weekly
"The best parenting book I've ever read."
-- Barbara McDonald, mother of two
"If everyone thought like Mr. Kohn, no one would have to worry about our generation."
-- Natalie Bosshart, age 16,
Belle Plaine, IA
"Kohn's views, while controverisal, are well-researched and ring true. . . . So throw out the
time outs and the 'atta girls' and get ready for a challenging and paradigm-shifting view of
parenting. Open the book and open your minds. You won't be disappointed."
-- www.simpleasthat.com (parenting website)
"Readers who are interested in raising moral and compassionate children will be challenged
and inspired by Unconditional Parenting."
-- Greater Good